alternative labrador standard

Each breed has an official standard. It’s a written description of the ideal specimen of a breed and is very important because it determines what a typical representative of a breed should look like. It precisely defines the basic characteristics such as appearance, movement and character of the “ideal representative of the breed”. The purpose of the standard is to preserve the breed’s characteristics and thus protect the breed from possible short-term new trends and personal preferences.

But this page is not about the official labrador standard. It’s about an alternative labrador standard, written through experiences of sharing a life with Bina – a fox red labrador.

GENERAL APPEARANCE
Strongly built, medium sized and utterly adorable. Made to eat, run, swim, work and cuddle.

CHARACTERISTICS
Very spirited, adaptable and devoted. Hunting skills well preserved – likes to chase cats, birds and bikes. Has to participate in everything. Personal stalker. Completely shameless, not afraid to look foolish or silly. Up for any adventure. Confident and affectionate with seriously contagious energy. Master at enjoying themselves. Hilarious sense of humor.

BEHAVIOUR AND TEMPERAMENT
Very intelligent, friendly and curious. Loves everyone and everything. Hopeless as a watchdog. Too trustful. Very bribable. Will do anything for food. Loves mental and physical activity. Never grows up. Water maniac and escape artist. Family dog with a chilled temperament and endless patience. Tolerant. Non-judgmental. Never bears a grudge.

HEAD
Made of stone and seriously smart. Contains a powerful operating machine, mostly occupied with thinking about food and discovering different ways to lure treats from humans.

EYES
Friendly and expressive. Professional snack monitor. Can see the smallest crumble on the other side of the room. Very effectively hypnotizing when begging for food.

EARS
Soft and floppy. Extremely kissable and antistress when cuddling. Very sensitive and effective, able to hear a fridge opening from the other side of the house. Selective hearing frequently turned on. Unfortunately, they are prone to host undesirable microorganisms. A perfect and patient listener, letting you express yourself.

TONGUE
Made for licking and delivering kisses. Extremely good at performing plates prewashing or licking the dirt from the floor.

MOUTH & TEETH
Programmed to grab things from the ground and run away from the owner. Made for chewing and carrying stuff. Can destroy or tear apart any indestructible toy. Can easily munch his way through your furniture. But absolutely not meant to bite.

BARKING
Only on command or from excitement when the doorbell sounds.

NOSE
Unbelievably effective. Composed of countless scent cells that detect any food left in an unlimited radius and all sorts of edible trash by labrador standards.

NECK
Strong enough to pull whatever is on the other side of the leash.

BODY
Sturdy, strong and muscular. Build like a tank. Made to work all day. Agile and capable of jumping high. Can easily move objects on their way. Can’t resist taking a dip in every source that contains water.

HEART
Huge, made of gold.

TAIL
Very powerful with coffee table-clearing abilities. Unstoppable, operating with enormous speed. Turns on automatically, frequently without any particular reason. Wagging is so vigorous it makes the butt shake.

FOREQUARTERS
The only thing you see when they knock you over after showing how happy they are to see you.

HINDQUARTERS
Producing occasional shameless, stinky farts that make you hold your breath. The thing you see when they turn around and plant their rear into your face demanding a good butt rub.

COAT
Water repellent, short double coat that doesn’t require much grooming. Only shed twice a year; 6 months in the spring and 6 months in the autumn. Water resistant and a mud magnet. Sticks very good to the clothes. Demands a powerful vacuum cleaner.

COLOUR
The principal lab’s coat colors are black, yellow and chocolate. But it may frequently vary in shade from light to dark mudded colour.

STOMACH
Made of iron. Has an endless capacity. Capable of storing the nastiest and smelliest things. Programmed to be always empty.

SIZE
Never too big to be a lap dog, but big enough to occupy most of your bed.

FAULTS
Absolutely nothing.